Pelicans are used to produce the raw fuel used in weaponized dog fart production.

WEAPONIZED dog farts are delivery systems of the super-concentrated, refined dog fart. Conceived and designed in 1938 by Rudolf Cantankerheit, an Austrian chemist and early adopter of Nazi proctology. Quickly outlawed in most countries, weaponized dog farts are now only used by mercenary and terrorist organizations. They are known to kill over 18 billion humans a year. The United Nations now considers the eradication of these weapons one of their utmost priorities and are currently seeking volunteers to help with the crisis.

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